Divorce and Remarriage

Anyone who has experienced divorce and/or remarriage in some way or another knows how challenging the readjustments can be. These readjustments take time to get used to. They won't happen overnight. In fact, it takes about 2 years to adjust and get used to them.

We were given four guidelines for blended families.

1. There is a minimum of 2 years to have a sense of normalcy. It takes time to figure out how you will work as a family.

2. It will never look or feel like a normal, 2-parent family. It's not the same and will never be the same! But that's ok. Every family is unique as it is, so don't stress that it's not a perfect looking family.

3. Biological parent should do all corrections/parenting. If the step-parent does the corrections and parenting, it leads to resentment toward that parent.

4. Step-parent should be like a really good aunt/uncle. This doesn't mean that they're the favorite aunt/uncle that gives out candy and treats. Traits of a really good aunt/uncle include being a role model or good example, supportive, gives advice, spends time with the kids, and supports the biological parent. 

Lastly, the parents of blended families need to have more closed-door councils/conferences. It's really important for the couple to figure out what is and isn't working for them and the kids. Blended families can work happily, it just takes time and effort to get there.